On February 23, 2012 we have a 5 year old boy and a 2 yearold girl placed in our home. Things seem to be going alright with both adultsand children adjusting to this new union. During their initial drop-off wenoticed that both of these children had bad coughs. The foster parents leavingthem with us tell us that the boy has had strep recently and is at the end ofhis antibiotics. A couple of days laterthe coughs are not getting better so we take the kids to Urgent Care where theyare both diagnosed with strep throat. The doctor knows that the 5 year old hadjust been treated for this illness from the information we submitted, butstates that the contagion can remain on toothbrushes, beds, and other items. Heprescribes antibiotics for both children and tells us to get rid of their oldtoothbrushes after the second day of taking the medication. We also washeverything that they have touched after this second day to make sure it doesnot come back.
During the tripto the Urgent Care while sitting in the waiting room filling out information onboth children a woman accosts my wife.
She asks, “Isn’tthat (mother’s name) kids?”
My wife isstunned and how unlikely is it that on our first time out of our home with ourfirst set of foster kids we would run into one of the mother’s ghetto buds?
My wife responds,“I cannot disclose that type of information to you.” and walks away from her. Shecomes to where I am sitting with the children and tells me what happened. Wenotice that the woman exits the room towards the parking lot and my wife walksover to apprise the person behind the desk of the situation. As she walkstowards the desk she can see outside through the glass doors that the otherwoman left through. This woman is on her cell phone and enforces my wife’sdecision to tell the establishment in case the police need to be notified. Mywife feels the woman has gone out to call the mother of these children to letthem know where they are. I agree and we are on high alert watching for any signof the mother who we have not seen at this point and for the other woman tocome back in and continue to act inappropriately. We are called back quicklybecause the office treats the matter as seriously as it should be treated. Ilove when people fully understand the situation. We are told that they willcall the police if they notice other people rallying with her and that we canleave through a back door for safety if needed. By the time we receive thediagnoses and prescriptions we have decided not to use the back door. If themother is stupid enough to jeopardize losing her kids forever by coming to thislocation then let it happen. We can handle the situation and it will only harmher in the long run. We never see the other woman again and the bio mother doesnot show up.
The next day mywife starts to feel ill and two days after that I begin to feel it too. We arecatching the strep from the kids. What a wonderful way to start out in thesystem. I am going to be starting the setup of the largest event in SouthernArizona at the University of Arizona in a few short days. It is known as “TheFestival of Books”. I am sick and extremely busy at work. My wife is feelingthe effects worse than me at this point and at home taking care of two sickchildren on top of the illness. On Monday, February 27, the 5 year old is ableto go back to school. I drop him off at 7:30 a.m. so he can eat breakfast thereand then hurry to work. The 2 year old stays at home with my wife who is stillsick. I will pick up my son (5 year old) from school at 2:40 p.m. and return towork each day except for Wednesday. He gets out at 1:40 p.m. on this day.
One problem withus getting sick is that we do not have insurance to ease the cost of going tothe doctor anytime we want. We always tough it through instead of paying hugebills for medical, but it is not the best way to get rid of strep. We end upfeeling its effects for over a month before we finally start to feel better.
Thursday, March1, 2012 is the starting day of the event setup. I need to get down to theUniversity and begin to paint out the placement of tents on one of the largerlawn areas before my crews show up to start building tents. I route the day,assign people last minute things to load and hurry down to the U of A. My hurrywas due to having to take my 5 year old son to school because transportationhas not been setup for him yet. I finish the marking of the first area that wewill begin to setup and my employees start to arrive in huge box trucks filledwith pipe to form the frames of the tents, metal fittings to fasten the pipetogether, and many other pieces of equipment needed for the process.
My wife calls andtells me that she cannot tell me why, only that I need to get home as quicklyand safely as possible. I tell her that there is no way I can leave becausethis is our largest event of the year and it is important that I am here tomonitor its progress. She tells me that she has already spoken to the owner ofthe company and that he is on his way to relieve my position at the University.I now know that it is more serious than ever because she has never had to callthe owner before calling me on issues. I tell my lead men that I have to leavebecause of an emergency, and give them items from my work truck that they willneed to fulfill the job ahead of them on this day. Not knowing that I will notbe returning until the event is almost underway the next week.
Now my mind iswandering through different scenarios of what has gone wrong. I immediatelythink that it must be the children, but hope not because they have not been inour care for long. Other things cross my mind: my parents (only because mymother has Lupus and her health has been failing for years), maybe my biochildren, or my father’s mother (my last living grandparent). For my wife tonot want to tell me knowing I have a twenty five minute drive home adds to theseriousness and I know the news will certainly be bad, but never could havepredicted the end result.
It has been justover one week since we received the placement of our first children in thefoster care system. You wouldn’t believe it and I still have a hard time comingto grips with the reality, but it happens anyway. My father is 64 years old, inseemingly perfect health and suffers a stroke / heart attack while driving an18 wheeler on the interstate in Utah. He has been driving these trucks eversince the coal mine he worked for caught fire at least 10 years before. Therewas no autopsy performed, so there is no exact knowledge of what befell him onthis day. He must have suffered one of these as he was driving for his truckended up on the other side of the highway on its way up the side of themountain. Had he gone the other direction he would have ended up down in acanyon and that would have most likely ended his life.
It is reportedthat my father was walking around his stuck vehicle waiting for a tow truck tocome and pull it down from the hill it had partially climbed. It had been twohours since a paramedic had checked him out and found no immediate danger orthreat due to injury. It sounds like my dad walked over to the EMS peoplestating that he did not feel well and then collapsed before anyone had a chanceto see what the matter was. He was already gone at this time, most likelybefore he hit the ground which left a huge bruise on one side of his face. Theytransported him to the nearest hospital but he never regained a heartbeat afterthe fall. I love and miss him dearly. I arrive home and when I first receive thenews I break down in my wife’s arms and cry uncontrollably. This is the secondperson I have lost in less than a month. Each I hold deep feelings for in myheart. It would make more sense had it been my mother, but not my dad.
My good friendand ex-assistant, dies on February 11, 2012 in an early morning rollover thatwent undiscovered until later in the day. I miss his celebration of lifebecause I am in Utah with my family to attend my father’s funeral and to celebratehis life. I have never lost someone I held dear until this year and now two occurrenceshave shaken the foundation of my world. When I heard the news of my friend itwas a Saturday, things were quiet, I was in my office at work when I was askedto talk to the father of his ex-girlfriend, who works at Arizona Party Rental.He met me where the warehouse meets the front offices, eye red from crying andI knew something was wrong. He spoke softly holding back the tears and randomjerks of the face when people are extremely upset. After telling me the news I wasin shock. I told him I was very sorry. I didn’t know what else to say and thinkI said I can’t believe it. He said he would be taking his daughter home and Itold him to do whatever he had to do. My friend had been a family friend ofthis man for many years as he dated this man’s daughter. She was the one whoinspired us to hire him in the first place. I walked into my office, lockingthe door behind me and started to cry as I looked up articles on the accidentonline.
My wife does mostof the planning for the trip we are to make to Utah. She calls my 20 year old sonover to tell him the news. He cries off and on for hours. My 17 year old daughtercries silently, her eyes red and stressed.
The young childrenthat we have only just begun to care for will need to go into a respite homeand this makes us feel so badly because they have been moved around enoughalready. There is no way around it. Preparations are made. My wife did anawesome job of it all and we were in Utah in a couple of days.
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